Soul Retrieval

Soul retrieval is a beautiful and poetic context in which one can become whole. Images of pieces of us scattered, lost and buried as we travel through life carries with it a deep, unrealized potential. 

We may believe that we're incomplete, unworthy, not enough, but the truth is that we've, in fact, simply cordoned off the parts of ourselves that we believed were too painful or too undesirable to carry. Instead, we fell into the false assumption that we'd be better off without these parts, that rejecting, ignoring or denying them would somehow lighten our load and make us into a better person.

The problem with this way of thinking is that it ultimately backfires. We become hobbled by these exclusions, a ghost of our former selves, a shaved down, molded and heavily modified projection of the person we believed we needed to be to be accepted and loved.

The longing for wholeness, and to be seen and loved unfiltered--exactly as we are--becomes our quest, but instead of searching inside which is the only place we can find it, we search outside ourselves in our relationships, our work, our possessions, our projects and so on. We're trying to find wholeness by searching for—not our actual missing parts—but better versions of ourselves. Unfortunately, this agenda will only add to the inner emptiness that is driving this relentless, never-ending, always-around-the-next corner search.

It usually take a painful disruption to shake us awake to our sleepy, habitual rituals. Something or, often someone, comes along that spins us around so fast that we can no longer find nor align with our well-worn path. The outer shine—through its pain teachers—has dimmed considerably, pushing us to withdraw to lick our wounds, and perhaps reflect on how we can avoid this pain in the future. This reflection can either lead us to choose ways to numb ourselves and live an even smaller version of ourselves, or it can become a catalyst that invites us to go within to sort through the debris of our past to find a key to a new door.

Soul retrieval is best done with the help and guidance of another. Our blind spots are too nuanced to allow us to fully see our own self-deception. Another set of objective eyes can light up the dark, hidden spots so that we can collect the parts of ourselves that we need.

It ‘s not enough to gather up our shunned parts. We must also accept, embrace and love them. This is done with honesty, vulnerability, followed by forgiving ourselves and others as needed. it would be the same as inviting a child who had been ostracized and sent to live in an unfinished, unlit basement for many years upstairs into the main part of the house. It's not as simple as just inviting her to come upstairs. She needs to be bathed, given new clothes, fed and attended to with love and compassion. Trust must be established again, so that over time, a healthy, natural relationship can happen. She is used to be shunned by you. She is used to living alone. She is used to being in the darkness. It will take time to settle into this new environment.

Over time, all that lives inside that abandoned part will dissolve into you and live there as if it was never separate, which, in truth, it never was. It was simply compartmentalized and walled off, atrophied and unexpressed.

Many of us do this with our gifts. We don't honor them, give them space or express them. They sit, unused, when they could be of so much benefit to ourselves and others. We don't realize how happy simply allowing these gifts would make us. Instead, we give into our misguided fears and resistance, believing that our gifts are unimportant and would be rejected if expressed.

This is one of the biggest lies we tell ourselves! We prefer to drift through our lives in the most superficial ways, focusing on trivial matters, never plumbing the depths of ourselves to discover what treasures may await us. This avoidance denies us and it denies the world of something that is needed. Gifts are not given to us by accident; they are given to us to shepherd and watch over and tend. We are their God-ordained custodians with the stipulation that we will use them, share them and regularly bring them forth. They are of no use to anyone while they are hidden. 

Gifts and parts must all be retrieval. We can have no hope of being whole without them.